Final Fantasy XI (FFXI) Ballista

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Abraham

I’m sure that many people already know of the infamous forum troll Alhanalem—who I refer to as Abraham due to my random surges of dyslexia.  In a nutshell, he’s practically another self-righteous NA player who claims to know the dynamics of Ballista but is actually as ignorant and clueless as the rest of the pack.  Regarding Ballista, ignorance is not bliss, my friend.  It only makes you a complete dumbass.

Evv and I happened to run into this joker on Undine (test server) roughly around the time when the trial version of Legion was introduced.  Considering the hundreds and even thousands of times that he trolled Ballista threads on public forums, we had a reasonable idea of how much of a joker this guy was, but Jesus Christ, his stupidity far exceeded both our expectations.

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Why Are People So…?

As many may already know, within the past few months, there has been a sizable influx of transferees to Lakshmi from a variety of servers, most notably Fenrir.  I must admit that their reputation precedes most of them in terms of manner, skill, as well as knowledge of the game.  Unfortunately, the typical NA style of Ballista revolves around slaughtering and completely domination over other players through solo effort.  Practically none of them actually play Ballista for the game itself—a team game in which involves quarrying, scoring, and teamwork—but rather for bloodshed.  For some reason, I’m apparently ‘cheap’ for using—say—a max potion during the midst of battle.  If quarrying is part of the Ballista, how exactly am I being ‘cheap’ for using a mechanic that’s part of the game?  And hell, it only gets worse from here.  It’s also apparently ‘cheap’ and cowardly to work as a team with allies—in other words, working as a team is synonymous to being a coward.  Other than with Lazurus, I consider myself patient in terms of dealing with these types of people, but even I can hardly maintain my composure sometimes.  Yeah, that’s me using Ukko’s Fury in town.  Out of fury.

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Wish Upon a Star

Imagine a peaceful evening with soft blinks of night stars and enchanting dances of fireflies, illuminating the surroundings with magnificence.  Suddenly, radiant streams of lights appear from above, and an old English nursery rhyme comes to mind:

Star light, star bright,
First star I see tonight;
I wish I may, I wish I might,
Have the wish I wish tonight.

With eyes gently closed and hands clenched together, you begin making your wish.  You feel hopeful, satisfied, soothed, and at peace.  Unfortunately, before you could finish chanting your wish, a meteor crash lands where you stand, and needless to say, yes.  Yes, you die.  In fact, you just got fucked up good.

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Dr. Dre: Dear Stupid… Please Use a Shovel and Bury Yourself

—Written by Drekien

Oh yes, you know who I’m talking to. Yes you, the puny worthless insignificant piece of shit tarutaru referred to as “Clubark”. This isn’t going to be just another one of my rants. I intend to inform and educate but at the same time rip you apart. I don’t know why you think you have any right to believe that you are in any way better than me. Never did you clarify with evidence the time we supposedly did fight each other 1v1 or explain why exactly you think you’re better. But not only that, I find it REALLY hilarious that you think I “envy you”. Oh my god I was really laughing when I read that dumb shit. Also you speak of me being a {Child}? What do you think it takes to be a child? Hmm, well, from my knowledge, it’s something called immaturity, and bitch… you emanate that in its wholesome form. Yea, I can be immature at times, but I know in the end that’s not how I really act, and that whatever you believe is making you more superior and mature than me is really just a clouded façade.

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Just a Few Clarifications

Yes, clarifications.

So I was trying to subscribe to another blog yesterday but couldn’t find a subscription link or button.  That’s when it hit me.  Where the hell did my subscription link go?  Well, shit, I must have accidentally removed it at one point, but it’s back now (at the bottom of the right side menu).  I was wondering why my subscriber count stopped increasing.  Anyway, I’m glad that I finally got this out of the way.

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Funniest Shit in the World

Have you ever seen a video with a Ballista commentator?  Well, you’re in luck because here are two of my favorites that I found a while back.  As you can see, these guys are obviously professional Ballista players.

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It May Be Gay, but I Like Twilight

I remember when I first laid eyes on the fashionable Twilight Helm, I flipped out and immediately became obsessed with its stunning good looks.  Stats come after style.  Of course, I tried my best (not really) to complete the prerequisite bosses in order to fight Shinryu, but due to my lack of experience and knowledge of the new Abyssea world, as well as the incompetence and unreliability of random Jueno shouts, I admit that I didn’t get very far—if at all.

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Dr. Dre: Cool Title Name Here

—Written by Drekien

It’s been a while since I’ve done a write-up. Yea I’ve been busy… Sure I’ve had better things to than write pointless blog entries. Well honestly I’ve been reading V’s so much that it has kinda dawned upon me that I once said that I wanted to share something with the world in the name of Ballista. What’s there to say? We have a lot of new members and NA transfers coming in. That’s cool. 60 cap is going pretty strong here on Lakshmi. That’s nice. I’m poor, and everyone loves using rabbit pies. FUCK THAT SHIT…

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Where the Hell Did You Go?

Right here, bitch.  Other than being a loner on the airship, I haven’t really been doing much recently.  Let’s see…

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The Hating Continues

I consider myself a calm person, but even the most collected people get pissed off every once in a while.  In my particular case, most of the times when I lose my cool (in regards to FFXI) is due to the incompetence of NA players.  Let’s take our good friend Lazurus for example:

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